Are your wings helping you or hurting you? – Type Four

In this episode, Kelsey Taylor interviews Enneagram Fours, Jayten Ames, and Dusty Green on their wings. In the context of the Enneagram, your wings are the two numbers directly adjacent to your primary Type.

You always have two wings. Think of your wings like the wings of a bird. Your primary type is the body, and your wings are on either side. You may have two enormous wings, two tiny wings, or even one big wing and one small wing.

The 4w3  is known as the “Bohemian,” and these two personalities are seemingly at odds.  The Four has a strong desire to express themselves authentically. At the same time, the Three consistently projects an image or version of themself to other that they believe others will accept and admire. 

When healthy, these Fours are productive and creative.  They can move away from the temptation to change who they are for the sake of fitting in, and instead, they believe they belong in any room they show up in and feel secure being their authentic self.

When they are not healthy this Four is extremely competitive and envious.  They experience extreme ups and downs and have a harder time practicing emotional calmness.

Fours need their Three wing to make their dreams a reality.  Without the Three wing, the Four would spend their days fantasizing without making a plan and doing the work to fulfill their desires. 

The 4w5 is known as the “Aristocrat,” and this combination coexists quite naturally together.  Both the Four and the Five are more inverted by nature.  They both enjoy spending time retreating to their mind, the Four to daydream and the Five to process information. They both prefer to withdraw from others, the Four to experience their emotion and the Five to recharge. 

When healthy, these Fours are profoundly creative and knowledgeable, they become experts in their craft, and they offer the world depth through their creative expressions. They can be both vulnerable and emotionally strong. 

When they are not healthy, they isolate themselves from relationships, preferring time with their emotions and research over the company of others. They are prone to self-loathing and cynicism. 

Fours need their Five wing to balance logic with feeling.  Without the Five, the Four would be all feeling and all emotions all the time.  The Five allows the Four to bring a more balanced approach to the world by offering a reason to coexist in harmony with emotion, resulting in an emotionally intelligent and more objective approach to life.

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